Top Ten Ways To Tell You Need A Co-Sysop:

10. You are spending more time with your bbs than Wife/Significant Other
9. You Haven't Replied to any Mail to you thinking I'll Get to IT
8. You test a Door locally and it works but Locks Up when a user
tries it. You of course don't realize it because you don't read the
mail.
7. You decide to add 10 National Echo nets with a total of 1000
message areas and just found out how much time it Will take.
6. You rebuild the entire BBS just for fun even though you have 25
other Sysop's calling for NetMail.
5. You are about to go on Vacation
4. You have no one to blame when things break
3. You have poor Admin Skills.
2. You have not Idea what to do next
1. You are Lazy!!!!!

Top Ten More Ways To Tell You Need A Co-Sysop:

10. Your wife gives birth and you find out about it in netmail.
9. You think Pepsi and potato chips make a nutritionally sound meal.
8. You know everything about your users but have no idea how old your
firstborn is.
7. You no longer read the newspaper because everything you need to know
is posted in netmail.
6. You have time to expand your conferences and setup new doors, but
don't have time to change a lightbulb.
5. You've learned to get by on three hours sleep.
4. You can find money for a 16.8 D/S, a 1 gig hard drive, and a CDRom,
but can't afford to fix that rickety step out front that someone
will undoubtedly break their leg on sometime soon.
3. You try to hit the F key to screen capture some interesting images
off the TV.
2. You say ROTFL and no one at work understands what you're talking
about.
1. Your speech is so peppered with BBSese that people think you've
learned a new language.
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* Origin: The Thunderbolt BBS - tbolt.synchro.net (1:19/33)

George,

I couldn't kil the quoted text; someone might've missed it earlier. . .

I have a bulletin on the BBS for those who might be thinking that being
a Sysop is all glory. It'd be nice if it was that way.

Rhonda knows me. It's the third call and the third appeasement engineer this year. You'd think they'd learn.

My favorite was the one where the high school kids wants access to "the
adult file area" for a high school sex education project". My response??
Nice try. <G>

Daryl

... Definition of an upgrade: Take old bugs out; insert new bugs.
=== MultiMail/Win v0.52
--- SBBSecho 3.14-Win32
* Origin: The Thunderbolt BBS - tbolt.synchro.net (1:19/33)

I have a bulletin on the BBS for those who might be thinking that being
a Sysop is all glory. It'd be nice if it was that way.

... "it's only a hobby, only a hobby, only a hobby, only a hobby..." right?

Rhonda knows me. It's the third call and the third appeasement

engineer

this year. You'd think they'd learn.

My favorite was the one where the high school kids wants access to "the adult file area" for a high school sex education project". My response?? Nice try. <G>

My high school librarian volmntarily gave me the key to the Forbidden Books Room, which held all the books publishers sent to him, thatt he school board didn't allow (like a full colour full detail French set of encyclopedias
about sex -- picture an illustrated(photos, not just drawings) Kama Sutra,
but more detailed. Also a college level botany textbook course on how to grow marijuana (back when it was illegal up here, too) with the highest THC, & various crude humour books (I liked them best, as a 13yo overeducated punk- wannabe)

We have our punny topic for today:

I couldn't get a reservation at the library.
They were completely booked.

Q: How does Santa keep his library organized?
A: Bookish elves

I asked the librarian if the library had any books about paranoia.
She whispered, "They're right behind you..."

A man walks into the library and asks, "Do you have any books on poor eyesight."
"NO, We don't!!!" replies the barman.

There is a sign outside my local library that says 'Watch for Cars'
Its a pretty good deal

Q: Why is it a good idea to put more books in prison libraries?
A: Because the prose outweigh the cons.

Q: How do you find the right book in a library that was caught in a flood?
A: Using the mildewey decimal system!

A man goes into a library and asks for a book about Pavlov's dogs and Schrodinger's cat.
The librarian says, "It rings a bell, but I don't know whether it's there or not."

Your friend,

<+]:{)}
Cyberpope, Bishop of ROM
--- SBBSecho 3.14-Linux
* Origin: The Rusty MailBox - Penticton, BC Canada (1:153/757.2)

George,

school board didn't allow (like a full colour full detail French set
of encyclopedias about sex -- picture an illustrated(photos, not just drawings) Kama Sutra, but more detailed. Also a college level botany textbook course on how to grow marijuana (back when it was illegal up here, too) with the highest THC, & various crude humour books (I liked them best, as a 13yo overeducated punk- wannabe)

You got an eyeful, I'm sure. <G>

I couldn't get a reservation at the library.
They were completely booked.

You may have to wait awhile.

Q: How does Santa keep his library organized?
A: Bookish elves

At each end as well.

I asked the librarian if the library had any books about paranoia.
She whispered, "They're right behind you..."

<SCREAM!> <G>

A man walks into the library and asks, "Do you have any books on poor eyesight."
"NO, We don't!!!" replies the barman.

The only gin we have is oxygen and nitrogen.

There is a sign outside my local library that says 'Watch for Cars'
Its a pretty good deal

Jaywalkers will be run down and ticketed by police.

Q: Why is it a good idea to put more books in prison libraries?
A: Because the prose outweigh the cons.

It can be a real ballots-ing act at voting time.

Q: How do you find the right book in a library that was caught in a
flood? A: Using the mildewey decimal system!

You mold your selections into what you want.

A man goes into a library and asks for a book about Pavlov's dogs and Schrodinger's cat.
The librarian says, "It rings a bell, but I don't know whether it's
there or not."

More than tongues are wagging about it.

Daryl

... Deja New: A feeling you've bought this product before.
=== MultiMail/Win v0.52
--- SBBSecho 3.14-Win32
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George Pope wrote to Daryl Stout <=-

I asked the librarian if the library had any books about paranoia.
She whispered, "They're right behind you..."

A man goes into a library and asks for a book about Pavlov's dogs and Schrodinger's cat.
The librarian says, "It rings a bell, but I don't know whether it's
there or not."

Already started sharing these two. LOL Thank you!




... Thesaurus: ancient reptile with an excellent vocabulary
--- MultiMail/Mac v0.52
* Origin: Omicron Theta * Southaven MS * winserver.org (1:116/18)

I asked the librarian if the library had any books about paranoia.
She whispered, "They're right behind you..."

A man goes into a library and asks for a book about Pavlov's dogs and Schrodinger's cat.
The librarian says, "It rings a bell, but I don't know whether it's there or not."

Already started sharing these two. LOL Thank you!

Those are good library jokes. I used to work in one. Wish I had seen
these back then! :D

Mike


* SLMR 2.1a * Software Independent: Won't work with ANY software.
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George Pope wrote to Daryl Stout <=-

I asked the librarian if the library had any books about paranoia.
She whispered, "They're right behind you..."

A man goes into a library and asks for a book about Pavlov's dogs and Schrodinger's cat.
The librarian says, "It rings a bell, but I don't know whether it's there or not."

Already started sharing these two. LOL Thank you!

Any time! That's kind of the point of this echo!

... Thesaurus: ancient reptile with an excellent vocabulary

Q: Whsa's another word for thesaurus?

That's usually an unanswered pun, as everoyone assumes tyhere can't be one,
but there is, I did my research cuz I hate unanswered questions.

A: a paralexicon

Actually, you can make your own -- the keyword to look up in Roget is "treasury" as that's what "thesaurus" means (no, it's not a dinosaur with a really good vocabulary)

English is one of my favorite topics for humour, as there's no limit:

I take it you already know
Of tough and bough and cough and dough?
Others may stumble, but not you,
On hiccough, thorough, lough and through?
Well done! And now you wish, perhaps,
To learn of less familiar traps?
Beware of heard, a dreadful word
That looks like beard and sounds like bird,
And dead: it's said like bed, not bead -
For goodness sake don't call it deed!
Watch out for meat and great and threat
(They rhyme with suite and straight and debt).
A moth is not a moth in mother,
Nor both in bother, broth in brother,
And here is not a match for there
Nor dear and fear for bear and pear,
And then there's dose and rose and lose -
Just look them up - and goose and choose,
And cork and work and card and ward,
And font and front and word and sword,
And do and go and thwart and cart -
Come, come, I've hardly made a start!
A dreadful language? Man alive!
I'd mastered it when I was five!

I was working on a tagline series at one point:

tooth=teeth/booth=beeth? No? English sucks.
ox=oxen/box=boxes. Yup, English sucks.

Your friend,

<+]:{)}
Cyberpope, Bishop of ROM
--- SBBSecho 3.14-Linux
* Origin: The Rusty MailBox - Penticton, BC Canada (1:153/757.2)